COVID-19 Advice For Trump Supporters

For the Trump supporters: Stock up on Clorox and drink up!  Go to church as often as possible and be sure to show your faith in god and strong sense of community through handshakes, hugs, and other forms of touch with fellow churchgoers. 

Increase your tithing! Send more money to the leaders of your respective congregations to further ensure your place in heaven.  Gather in large groups… relax and fully enjoy the company of others in your backyards, in wooded areas, but especially indoors.  Share the bountiful harvest through home-cooked dishes you’ll bring to these fetes, making sure to keep the food indoors as well (You wouldn’t want the mayonnaise to spoil.). 

Display your guns proudly at such gatherings… show them off as a sign of personal pride.  Let others touch them… hold them… point them at others in the room.  You’ll know what to do. 

Unmask your faces and your liberties and wear them as badges of courage and faith in Jesus! 

Stop covering your mouths when coughing or your noses when sneezing.  Coughing and sneezing is your first amendment right. Those were rules of the classroom meant to keep you in your places, even as children…commie liberal mind control used to indoctrinate you into a perverse system designed by those in the shadow of FDR… the communists and Obama who plotted to overthrow the godly Republican corporatist government… (The rich know what's best for you.) followers of Lenin, of Mao… given the chance, those who would have changed the very fabric of this Christian American Way of Life denying you the right to own that shiny Ford Super Duty that awaits your next adventure of harassing those "new Black or liebul of LGBTQ neighbors" who just moved in down the block.  You deserve the right to go forth and hold dominion over the others… the weak and infirmed… the non Whites those... hell bound Obamanites who simply don’t understand Jesus, those you simply don’t have the time to reeducate.  After all, your liberties are at stake.  GUNS GOD AND GOLD! MAGA!